Guilt is a common but wasted emotion. It often comes about from trying to be a perfect mother when perfection does not exist. When guilt pops up, check in with what your guilt is telling you. Does it come from overly high expectations, or from an inner knowing that something is not sitting well with you? Explore it, make choices in line with what you value, but don't let guilt govern your sense of self. Get to know who you are, what matters to you, and what you want for your child/ren. Trying to be a perfect mother does not help anyone. If you are feeling guilty much of the time, this could be a symptom of depression, and it might help to check in with your GP or a therapist if your mood is low.
Take stock of the pace in which you are operating. Does it seem like there are endless tasks on your 'to do' list? You don't have time to sit down? You are constantly rushing? Do you feel stressed by the deadline of your baby’s due date?
We can fall into the trap of just keeping on going – trying to get everything done before bubs comes along. Stop...slow down. Add "time-out" to your 'to do' list. No one can just keep going. Allow your 'to do' list to roll over each day. Slow down the pace in which you are moving. Listen to what your body needs, take breaks, and spend time tuning in to your baby.
It's important to restore our systems. Ironically, this allows us to get more done. Look realistically at what could be done after the baby is born. Does it all have to be done now? If you are feeling out of control, your sleep is disturbed from stress, or you feel that your stress levels are just too high, seek help.
Posted by Dr Renée Miller